Men

A man who fathers a child whom he proceeds to ignore is a second-class citizen.
~ William F. Buckley, Jr., Speech to the International Conservative Congress (1997). The Social Reponsibility of Conservatives

Men are all right for friends, but as soon as you marry them they turn into cranky old fathers, even the wild ones. They begin to tell you what's sensible and what's foolish, and want you to stick at home all the time. I prefer to be foolish when I feel like it, and be accountable to nobody.
~ Willa Sibert Cather, My Ántonia (1918). Book III. Lina Lingard

Old men are like that, you know. It makes them feel important to think they're in love with somebody.
~ Willa Sibert Cather, My Ántonia (1918). Book III. Lina Lingard

A father ... knows exactly what those boys at the mall have in their depraved little minds because he once owned such a depraved little mind himself. In fact, if he thinks enough about the plans that he used to have for young girls, the father not only will support his wife in keeping their daughter home but he might even run over to the mall and have a few of those boys arrested.
~ Bill Cosby, Fatherhood (1986). Chapter 6

A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when he's in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station.
~ Bill Cosby, Fatherhood (1986). Chapter 3

Any man today who returns from work, sinks into a chair, and calls for his pipe is a man with an appetite for danger.
~ Bill Cosby, Fatherhood (1986). Chapter 5

Fathers are the geniuses of the house because only a person as intelligent as we could fake such stupidity. Think about your father: He doesn't know where anything is. You ask him to do something, he messes it up and your mother sends you: "go down and see what your father's doing before he blows up the house." He's a genius at work because he doesn't want to do it, and he knows someone will be coming soon to stop him.
~ Bill Cosby

It is a point of pride for the American male to keep the same size jockey shorts for his entire life.
~ Bill Cosby, Time Flies (1987).

I cannot talk with civet in the room,
A fine puss-gentleman that's all perfume.
~ William Cowper, from Poems by William Cowper of the Inner Temple, Esq. (1782). Conversation

A gentleman can live through anything.
~ William Faulkner, The Reivers (1962).

No man is the boss of his own house, but he can make up for it, he thinks, by making a dog play dead.
~ W.C. Fields

I have among my Caricatures of the end of the last Century several in which the smart man of the period is depicted in a bright yellow coat: I believe that the term 'Dandy' was given to those gentlemen from the brilliant yellow of their 'dandelion' coats: the shade depicted is so nearly as possible the tint of that familiar flower.
~ William Augustus Fraser, Hic et Ubique (1893). 'Dandy' derivation

A gentleman is one who understands and shows every mark of deference to the claims of self-love in others, and exacts it in return from them.
~ William Hazlitt, from The Plain Speaker (1826). On the Look of a Gentleman

Real men don't dance. They sit, sweat, and curse.
~ Bill Hicks, from Love, Laughter and Truth (2002 album).

Boys should not play with weapons more dangerous than they understand.
~ E.T.A.W. (Ernst Theodor Amadeus Wilhelm) Hoffmann, The Deed of Entail, trans. by J. M. Cohen, Ernst Theodor Wilhelm Hoffmann Tales, p. 245

There was no trace of vulgarity in him; he was not self-conscious, not anxious to shine; he was modesty itself, and in his speech and manner and appearance he was, to put it all in one word, a gentleman.
~ William Henry ("W.H.") Hudson, from A Traveller in Little Things (1921). IV: Blood: A Story Of Two Brothers

The freedom of authentic masculinity is an amazing thing to see. It produces a "divine elasticity" in men. Finally they can lead with firmness, then submit with humility. They can challenge with a cutting edge, then encourage with enthusiasm. They can fight aggressively for just causes, then moments later weep over suffering.
~ Bill Hybels, Honest To God? (1990). Authentic Manhood

Most men's friendships are too inarticulate.
~ William James, in The Thought and Character of William James (1935). Letter to Carl Stumpf; 26 May 1893

The prince of darkness may be a gentleman, as we are told he is, but whatever the God of earth and heaven is, He can surely be no gentleman. His menial services are needed in the dust of our human trials, even more than his dignity is needed in the empyrean.
~ William James, from Pragmatism: A New Name for Some Old Ways of Thinking (1907).

He boasts nor wealth nor high descent, yet he may claim to be
A gentleman to match the best of any pedigree.
~ William James Linton, Claribel and Other Poems (1865). Nature's Gentleman. Stanza 1

Men are only as loyal as their options.
~ Bill Maher, ABC TV (9 August 2001). Politically Incorrect

He was a great thundering paradox of a man.
~ William Manchester, American Caesar: Douglas MacArthur, 1880-1964 (1978).

After all, a man marries to have a home, but also because he doesn't want to be bothered with sex and all that sort of thing.
~ W. Somerset Maugham, The Circle, Act II (1921).

It is but seldom that a man loves once and for all; it may only show that his sexual instincts are not very strong.
~ W. Somerset Maugham, from A Writer's Notebook (1949).

The life of most men is merely a ceaseless toil to prepare food and home for their offspring; and these enter the world to perform exactly the same offices as their progenitors.
~ W. Somerset Maugham, from A Writer's Notebook (1949). 1896 entry

You men! You filthy, dirty pigs! You're all the same, all of you. Pigs! Pigs!
~ W. Somerset Maugham, The Trembling of a Leaf (1921). VII. Rain

There isn't a lot of organized psychological theory about the relationship between men and guns but in men's dreams, guns frequently play a role and, when they do, it is likened to the penis and all that that means to them.
~ Dr. Nancy McWilliams, (Interview; 1999)

The surest aid in combating the male's disease of self-contempt is to be loved by a clever woman.
~ Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Human, All Too Human (1878).

Men are generally more careful of the breed of their horses and dogs than of their children.
~ William Penn, Some Fruits of Solitude (1693). Part I. Right Marriage

This is the first test of a gentleman: his respect for those who can be of no possible value to him.
~ William Lyon ("Billy") Phelps

In dress, habits, manners, provincialism, routine and narrowness, he acquired that charming insolence, that irritating completeness, that sophisticated crassness, that overbalanced poise that makes the Manhattan gentleman so delightfully small in its greatness.
~ William Sydney Porter (O. Henry)

Every man has wanted to be a cowboy. Why play Wall Street and die young when you can play cowboy and never die?
~ Will Rogers

Money, horse racing and women, three things the boys just can't figure out.
~ Will Rogers, in The New York Times (7 March 1935).

There are three kinds of men. The one that learns by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.
~ Will Rogers, The Wisdom of Will Rogers

No other man-made device since the shields and lances of the ancient knights fulfills a man's ego like an automobile.
~ William Rootes, quoted in BBC TV (14 January 1958). Who Said That?

An odd man, lady! every man is odd.
~ William Shakespeare, Troilus and Cressida. Act IV, scene v

A man I am, cross'd with adversity.
~ William Shakespeare, The Two Gentlemen of Verona. Act IV, scene i

[H]e is every man in no man.
~ William Shakespeare, The Merchant of Venice. Act I, scene ii

He that hath a beard is more than a youth, and he that hath no beard is less than a man.
~ William Shakespeare, Much Ado About Nothing. Act II, scene i

Shall I never see a bachelor of three score again?
~ William Shakespeare, Much Ado About Nothing

Sigh no more, ladies, sigh no more,
Men were deceivers ever,-
One foot in sea and one on shore,
To one thing constant never.
~ William Shakespeare, Much Ado About Nothing

That man that hath a tongue, I say, is no man,
If with his tongue he cannot win a woman.
~ William Shakespeare, The Two Gentlemen of Verona. Act III, scene i

The Prince of Darkness is a gentleman.
~ William Shakespeare, King Lear. Act III, scene iv

There is no ancient gentlemen but gardeners, ditchers and grave-makers; they hold up Adam's profession.
~ William Shakespeare, Hamlet. Act V, scene i

'Tis a happy thing to be the father unto many sons.
~ William Shakespeare, King Henry VI, Part III. Act III, scene ii

We men may say more, swear more: but indeed
Our shows are more than will; for still we prove
Much in our vows, but little in our love.
~ William Shakespeare, Twelfth Night. Act II, scene iv

The turfy hammock is our bed,
Our home is in the red deer's den,
Our roof, the tree-top overhead,
For we are wild and hunted men.
~ William Gilmore Simms, from The Partisan: A Tale of the Revolution (1835). The Swamp Fox

From the first time the doctor placed you in my arms
I knew I'd meet death before I'd let you meet harm
Although questions arose in my mind, would I be man enough?
~ Will Smith, Just the Two of Us (2001).

To be a man means to he strong in purpose and self-control. If your manhood is buried under doubt, dig it out. There's a Gettysburg in every man's life which he has to fight. To be ready is half the secret of success.
~ William A. "Billy" Sunday, Show Thyself a Man (Sermon)

I say to you, make yourself a lady's man as much as ever you can.
~ William Makepeace Thackeray, from Sketches and Travels in London (1847). Mr. Brown's Letters to his Nephew: The Influence of Lovely Woman Upon Society

What is it to be a gentleman? Is it to be honest, to be gentle, to be generous, to be brave, to be wise, and, possessing all these qualities, to exercise them in the most graceful outward manner? Ought a gentleman to be a loyal son, a true husband, and honest father? Ought his life to be decent -- his bills to be paid -- his tastes to be high and elegant -- his aims in life lofty and noble?
~ William Makepeace Thackeray, The Book of Snobs (1848). II. The Snob Royal

If ... boyhood and youth are but vanity, must it not be our ambition to become men?
~ Vincent Willem van Gogh, in The Complete Letters of Vincent Van Gogh, vol. 1 (1958). Letter of 12 September 1875, to his brother Theo

I have a hammer! I can put things together! I can knock things apart! I can alter my environment at will and make an incredible din all the while! Ah, it's great to be male!
~ Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.
~ Robin Williams (on the Clinton/Lewinsky affair), Live On Broadway (25 July 2002).

We men are driven to meet Miss Right ... or at least Miss Right Now.
~ Robin Williams

We as men should stand up as men and protect our women and children. I am a man, and I will walk upright as a man should. I will not crawl.
~ Robert Franklin Williams, (1959)

So, now I am a man, he thought. Well, almost. Almost a man.
~ Tad Williams, Memory, Sorrow, and Thorn, Book 3 (April 1994). To Green Angel Tower, Part 1

[M]en don't want anything they get too easy. But on the other hand men lose interest quickly.
~ Thomas Lanier ("Tennessee") Williams, A Streetcar Named Desire (1947). Scene Five

I feel the caress of my own fingers
on my own neck as I place my collar
and think pityingly
of the kind women I have known.
~ William Carlos Williams, from Sour Grapes (1921). The Gentle Man

Men are not friends where it concerns
a woman? Fighters. Playfellows.
~ William Carlos Williams, from Sour Grapes (1921). Romance Moderne

On the one hand, we'll never experience childbirth. On the other hand, we can open all our own jars.
~ Bruce Willis

Come, for my part I will have only those glorious, manly pleasures of being very drunk, and very slovenly.
~ William Wycherley, The Country Wife (1673). Act I, scene i

"Because I am mad about women
I am mad about the hills,"
Said that wild old wicked man
Who travels where God wills ...
~ William Butler Yeats, The Wild Old Wicked Man